This sermon was the second in a series of eight which looks at what the Bible has to say about different areas of life.
You only have to look in our newspapers and magazines to realise how confusing people find “being in love”. When we first “fall in love” it appears to be the answer to a problem by fulfilling longings we have inside. Yet soon we are struggling with new problems such as jealousy, fear or guilt – triggered by our love affair. Then when we share a home with our lover, yet further issues arise which damage our feelings of love: boredom, irritation and disagreements over lifestyle. At times, relationships can descend into two people hurting and controlling one another. Sometimes this is physical violence, but it can also be using words, emotions or desires to make the other person feel some pain. And because of the above factors, relationships can end; we no longer feel that we can remain with that other person, and are left with simply a mixture of painful feelings.
As a result of all our troubles with love, we often look to satisfy our internal longings in other ways. Some pursue multiple relationships to free themselves from the “burden” of a single, responsible one. Sometimes we indulge in imaginary relationships to meet our longings maybe by watching romantic films or viewing pornographic images. Yet none of these things really satisfies and often they become addictive.
Where does the answer lie? The Bible teaches us to think afresh. Firstly, we have to understand why we are made to love: it is because God himself has always been love (1 John 4:7). God is Father, Son and Holy Spirit: he has forever lived in a relationship of love. We are made in his image, to live in ways which are a little like his glorious ways. Secondly, we need to know how God implemented our ability to love. It centres upon marriage and the family: one man joined so closely to one woman that they are called “one flesh” who then have children together (Genesis 1 & 2).
However, we have badly messed that patten up. Instead of seeking to live with another as one flesh, instead our pursuit of love is often driven by selfishness: satisfying ourselves. In turn this has lead to many distortions of God's design, where no longer do we simply come together with one member of the opposite sex in a committed relationship. This all flows from our refusal to love God himself and has actually provoked God to great anger, because he cannot abide seeing love ruined.
But out of his great love God has offered us forgiveness through Jesus at huge cost to himself (1 John 4:1). So now by entrusting ourselves to Jesus and committing ourselves to his people, we can learn how to love properly.
(1) Take an honest look at the relationships you have had in your life. Have they been marked by a God-like, self-giving, love? Isn't the truth that they've been far from that. Should you talk to God about that? Apologise?
(2) Read up about Jesus' death upon the cross. See God's love in action and what it means for those who know Jesus. Thank God for his love.